My Hippocratic Oath

Its 3am and its raining outside.
Been browsing through my entries after a verrrry flattering comment(Thanks babe yes I remember u) and discovered its rather memalukan that I haven't really written anything with much substance for a while.

Janji koas postponed lagi!
I'm irritated by the fact that I could have seized this opportunity and gone back Malaysia. But there's no denying that pleasant feeling when I realize I get another week to bum around instead of freaking out about the future.
Everything I've learned or tried to in these last 4years will be put to the test.
My resolve, my endurance, my faith in myself will probably be strained and bent.
I'll be bullied, called names, embarrassed, humiliated.
THAT I am sure I can take.
Its the stuff they don't tell you that worries me.
How hard will it be to sleep at night after I watch someone lose their child?
How hard will it be not to cry when I tell someone there's nothing left we can do?
How hard will the guilt be when I realize so many have it so bad?
Will I be able to live with myself if I make a fatal mistake?
Will I be able to live with myself if I find out I can't take it?

Guess its a good time to remember why I wanted all this.

To give everybody that second chance,
To witness little everyday miracles,
To stare death in the face and not flinch,
To witness humanity at every turn,
To learn of life from every possible side,
To live for somebody else.

I pray I have the will and strength to finish what I started.
I want to be remembered, not just by the people I know, but also by strangers whose lives I was able to touch in some remote small way.
I want to be significant, not shouted from the rooftops, not set in stone or carved in steel, but in the tender whisper of a mother to her newborn son, the extended lease on an ailing father's final months, the reason a smoker quits.
That shall be my mark on the world.

AMIN.

*reedited this from my friendster blog. Seems awfully poyo the 1st time i reread it but decided that it shall be like my personal Hippocratic oath.Which means the poyoness is totally acceptable!